Ayah Halimah


screenshot_2016-05-02-20-30-11-816.jpeg

Ayah, ini Halimah
Ini putrimu yang berkalung bunga rumput
Dan kau tahbiskan putri mahkotamu
Pada sesungging senyum terhangat di belahan tropis

Halimah ini tak cantik, ayah
Tak secantik lima tahun lalu saat senyumku masih lucu
Di bawah sinar matahari di wajahmu
Dan duniaku yang sederhana tak pernah berhenti berpelangi

Masih kusimpan buku pemberianmu, ayah
Buku yang kutahu kau beli setelah menabung bertahun-tahun,
meski harganya pun tak seberapa
Agar kudapat menggapai cita-citaku yang setinggi langit
Bukankah kemewahan itu terkadang memiliki bentuk rupa yang beda?

Kesedihan datang membawa jiwamu pergi
Tapi aku percaya kau bawa cahaya di kaki ‘arsy
Maka biarlah kesedihan itu jadi milik kami
Sementara kau pergi dan menunggu di atas sana

Ke hutan aku temukan sungai tengah kilau
Saat aku setengah gila menjarah-jarah bumi
Mendulang pasir-pasir kasar yang mengkasarkan jemari
Kukira taklah sesulit ini mengikuti jejakmu
Meski aku wanita

Sungguh tanpa ilmu kita seakan tak punya harga
Maka hanya tubuh yang kukorbankan 
Di bawah terik, parut pasir kasar dan beban di atas kepala
Demi hidup mereka 
wanita-wanita yang kehilanganmu, termasuk aku

Inilah jalanku yang putus sekolah
Layang-layang putus hanya cantik sebentar
Tak lama ia kan koyak dan compang-camping
Teriris terik, tergerus air, terlesap waktu
Namun aku bukanlah kayu apalagi batu

Pesanmu terus teringat
Kejar cita-cita setinggi langit
Maka meski aku bodoh, ku ‘kan cari sedikit-sedikit
Meski tak sampai langit
Cukup sampai hati yang lapang
Ibu yang tenang, dan
adik-adik yang bersekolah dengan riang
*

-untuk anak-anak yang belum mampu mendapatkan pendidikan layak-

Halimah’s Father

Father, this is Halimah
This is your daughter who once wore grass as garlanded necklet
And you ordain me as crown princess
With the warmest smile in the tropical hemisphere

Halimah is not pretty enough, father
Not as pretty as five years ago when my smile was still cute
Under the sun of your face
And my simple world was never unpainted with rainbows

I still have the book that you gave, father
The book that I know you bought after saving for years,
although the price was somehow not too expensive
So that I can reach my dreams that as high as the sky
Isn’t it sometimes luxury has a different shape?

Then sadness came and brought your soul away
But I believe you brought light in the bottom of heaven’s throne
Then let all the griefs are being ours
While you left us and waiting up there

To the forest I found a river’s sparkling
When I was half-crazy digging the earth
Mining coarse sands that roughened my fingers
I thought it won’t be this hard to follow your track
Although I’m a woman

Indeed without knowledge we seemed to not have a price
Then only this body that I could sacrifice
Under blistering sun, scarring coarse sand and heavy loads on the head
For the sake of their lives
the women who lost you, including me

This is my fate as poor dropout student
A broken kite is temporarily being gorgeous
Soon it will be tear up apart and tattered
Torn by the blistering sun, eroded by water, faded in time
But I’m not a wood, not even more a stone

I keep remembering your message
Chase the dreams as high as the sky
So even though I’m not smart enough, I will keep trying little by little
Although it won’t be as high as the sky
Just enough until reaching a big heart
a peaceful mother, and
younger siblings who attend school cheerfully
*

-to all the children out there who can not obtain proper education-

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s